“I’m an old man. I’m confused!”


A proud confession–for young and old alike–for those times when you do something wrong and, at that moment, “I screwed up!” doesn’t sound as compelling as “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”

Jerry’s Uncle Leo swiped a few books at a bookstore and Jerry happened to see him do it. When Jerry alerted the store security, who promptly swarmed, Uncle Leo promptly requested the “senior citizen discount.”

We grow old to find some of the latitude we had when we were young–latitude for forgetfulness, for miscommunication, for errors in judgment. Even for wrongdoing: the spray paint on high school property because you’re “just goofing off” becomes your backing into a bad driver in a parking lot because you’re older and have more insurance. In these two periods of life we get a break, some slack–because we’ll get it eventually, the straightening up and flying right.

Problem is, all the times of our life in between being old and being young could use some of that slack too.

So a toast…to Uncle Leo: not for the petit larceny he thought he could get away with, but for the uplifting remark we’re happy to make off with.

From “The Bookstore”
Episode 17, Season 9
Seinfeld Volume 8, Disc 3
Timecode for the scene: 10:43

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