“I never met a man who knew so much about nothing.”
April 1, 2012

cropped-jerry-seinfeld-stand-up-comedy-seinfeld1(another Seinfeld-in-culture note before you read on to the latest Seinfeld-isms below)

Jerry was flying first class and living it up (while Elaine suffered in coach) when this line came his way. His seatmate was marveling at a comment he’d just made about the fudge sundae they were eating (“They got the fudge on the bottom. You see? That enables you to control your fudge distribution as you’re eating your ice cream!”).

Who knows what Jerry will discuss in his “comedic distribution” this Wed, April 4, when he brings his stand-up again to Norfolk, Virginia. But I’ll be there, marveling at his comments. Marveling as I laugh, that is, at the insights of a guy whose brand of comedy is still relevant enough after all these years to play to packed houses. Even those who don’t laugh at Seinfeld–either his act or his show–have to hand it to a guy who gets a standing “o” as he takes the stage.

Let us all marvel then at more recent evidence of how Seinfeld continues to “live it up” in practically every section of our lives, from cars to politics to…

Tune in soon for a new Seinfeld-ism: a timely observation on spring (among other things) from a certifiable/smitten George.

“You’re quite breathtaking.”
August 4, 2010

A flat-out put-down (disguised as a flattering observation) to use in lieu of what you really want to say…which would take the listener’s breath away–huffing at the horrible insensitivity of your comment, that is.

Vacationing with friends who had a baby, Jerry, Elaine, and Kramer finally got a good look at that baby and–Gehhh. Evidently the baby (which we never see) would have made some of the world’s ugliest leaders (de Gaulle, Golda Meir, etc.) run up a tree. Enter the handsome family doctor, Ben, who refers to Elaine as “breathtaking” and now she really likes him. When Ben then pays the baby the same compliment–Errr?–confusion builds in Elaine until Ben later explains, “Well, you know, Elaine, sometimes you say a thing like that just to be nice.”

The initial reactions of Jerry, Elaine, and Kramer to the baby–in front of the baby’s parents–said it all, about the predicament most of us face when telling others what we really think about them: Jerry and Elaine masked their repulsion; Kramer’s reaction, witnessed in another episode that included this baby, was to snap his head back as if he’d just been hit, literally, with an ugly stick.

Wish for it though we might, we can’t all be Kramer, whose life was, as George once put it, a “fantasy camp”—weekly activities that included mooching off neighbors, sex without dating…and giving opinions without repercussion. We can’t, for example, tell that micromanaging boss what Kramer once told an actor friend of Elaine’s, “Why don’t you just give up?

Dealing with people’s feelings involves a number of reactions that typically fall between two options: you might suck the air out of the room (e.g., “No soup for you!”) or you might blow smoke into it—using “breathtaking” at will, to describe what you will.

From “The Hamptons”
Episode 21, Season 5
Seinfeld Volume 4, Disc 4
Timecode for the scene: 7:20

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