“When they pull that needle out, I let the ex-ple-tives fly.”
August 2, 2010

A colorful confession to share with those who know you to talk like a saint (but there’s a sailor in you too).

Jawline sagging from a little novocaine hangover, Kramer met Jerry and George at the gym after a visit to the dentist. When Jerry brought up their dentist’s new “adults only” policy, Kramer lauded his freedom to let his language go. “You find the need to use a lot of obscenities at the dentist’s?” Jerry asked. 

Life tees up many opportunities to tee off with a lot of obscenities. Yet we watch our mouths most of the time because, while we may think in phrases reminiscent of an R-rated Martin Scorsese movie, we must talk more like a PG-rated Steve Martin flick. Because that shows maturity, courtesy…all that crap. The problem with that dichotomy is, censoring yourself is sometimes a real pain in the *ss.

Catharsis is here, thanks to 1) studies showing that profanity enables people to better deal with pain, and 2) the ease of making Kramer’s confession yours, as you adapt it to any curse-worthy situation (paying the bills, etc.).

Don’t forget to pronounce each syllable of the key word (“ex-ple-tives”). It’s not a flourish–it’s a must. You’re telling those around you that, not only will you not bleep yourself, you’ll frickin’ spell it out for them too if need be.

From “The Jimmy”
Episode 19, Season 6
Seinfeld Volume 5, Disc 4
Timecode for the scene: 9:40

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